2013-02-15 - Do, Do, Do
I have a full-time job as a manager with a technology company. I think I do a good job at it and often have to work outside of the traditional 40 hour week. I like to think of that as my job that allows me to do all the other things to do without having to worry about money. So for little or no money, I have a long list of things I do. I serve as a Student Pastor at a small rural church which involves overseeing youth and children's ministry. I work mostly with the youth teaching Sunday school and leading a weekly Wednesday night worship service. I write this weekly devotional also. I do a lot. I am busy. It's not my deeds and busy-ness that makes God love me though. He simply loves me. I think I have forgotten that. At least it's not a two way thing anymore I serve out of duty and obligation not out of love. I have come to seek results and get insecure when the fruit doesn't come. I have forgotten I am the branch and he is the vine. He, not me, is the source. He, not me, is the power.
I am taking a break from this ministry for a period so I can learn again simply to abide in him, rely on him, and love him. Christian Fellowship Devotionals is a great ministry and am happy to have been a part of it for the last eight years. But no ministry, not even the ministry you have, is the greater than the relationship with my God, Savior, and King. I am taking a sabbatical for at least four weeks so that I can fall in love with Him again. The time I'd spend mulling over what to write, and then actually writing it, will now be used to just be with him. It will be tempting to fill that time with a new TV show, a stack of books on how to do this or that better, or additional activities with family and church but no action no matter how noble, nothing is more valuable than Christ; until I get that again inside my heart, I have nothing. I simply ask you to pray for me.
I love Jesus but I have just loved him way too Martha like. I need to do what is most important and deliberately lay aside something to sit Mary-ish at his feet and soak him in. Abide in Christ.
I am a very do-driven individual. I do what I believe God wants me to do but as I do I also see what others do. I judge them and say I'd not do that because it is hateful, hurtful, and judgmental. Did you catch that? I judge them for being judgmental. How's that for irony. This week I realized I am just as guilty as being hateful and hurtful and yes, judgmental, as those I am critical of. Why? I am convinced it is because I started pursuing deeds and one-upping others. I stopped pursuing the one my life should be centered on.
John 15:4-5 (NKJV)
Bearing fruit comes from abiding. Abiding doesn't come from bearing fruit. Pray for me as I reconnect with the vine. Pray for yourself too that you not forget this very valuable lesson.
All scripture references from KJV unless otherwise noted